MAILBAG FOR DIRTBAGS
I have spent my life as a proud and vocal champion of free expression. I would like The Haul to be a platform for ALL voices to be heard, and I will not suppress politically unpopular speech. That's why I'm bringing you yet another edition of Mailbag, where freedom rings out and where everyone has a verified heart!
-First off we have a message from a West Coast journalist named Nicolle who Abby and I met recently at this Internet power hour. Nicolle and her photographer manfriend Trevor were nice and fun and we would've talked longer but it was after 9pm on a weeknight. Anywho, Nicolle asks: Is this a newsletter that offers an “ask Jesse” section? Bc, ohhh boy, do I have produce related questions for you!
Then when I followed up and asked what questions she had, Nicolle said "I forget." Friendship over!
-Reader Carey, who runs our weekly veggie box provider, had some inside scuttlebutt to share about my local enemy Food Bazaar. Carey's husband thinks their quality has rapidly declined in the last month or two! The food is older and mustier, allegedly, now that it's not FB's big fancy grand opening. I asked if her husband was talking about produce, meat, that kind of thing, but he meant shelf-stable items like cereal and flour. This seems implausible, but Carey is one of our favorite people!
-Reader "my mom" has mentioned multiple times that she "doesn't really read The Haul." Do I believe her? Uncertain, but she has been sending me articles on botulism ever since I shared our rancid garlic encounter; I think she reads The Haul. Let's see if she reads this: Hey mom, you are one of the best mothers I know, definitely in like, the top 20.
-Reader Nicole, an IRL friend, says:
The former thrift store near us is being fitted out by Metropolitan Market--parent company a Korean grocer--and it will stand in the way of my grocery salvage. We've already taken to wondering what we'll call it. Currently it's known as the Bougiemart.
While working near one when I first moved to Seattle, I was amazed to discover that unlike most Seattle grocers, they stocked no marshmallow-flavored vodka, and all the pink wine was rosé rather than white zinfandel. It was the only place I could find the good French vermouth that was absent everywhere else. This is both seductive and an indicator of what's happening in my neighborhood (as if tearing down the gentleman's club and the autobody shops wasn't already a sign). Still gonna hit up the salvage first, though.
OH AND: that mayonnaise bottle should have a screw top. I pour in a little vinegar and olive oil, some herbs, shake it and it becomes a creamy dressing. Tarragon if you like a nice tuna salad. That's my plastic Hellman's/Best-Foods-West-of-the-Rockies hack. Works for all mustards, too.
Someone had a little too much coffee this morning and is feeling VERBOSE.
~N
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I had more messages to share but this edition is already too long! (Sorry Christina, your time will come). Until next week.
xo,
Jesse
Featured Items
I've been suckered by novelty again — I fear these dogs will be inedible. I bought them because I misread "Southern Brand" as "Southern Style" which seemed like an unfamiliar wiener varietal. Apparently it just means they were produced in everyone's favorite Southern state: Ohio (?) I'm too lazy to go take another photo but these hot dogs have a very unhealthy pink hue, akin to bubble gum. Dammit, Jesse Jones.
This is a weird salmon brand: Its website is all about record earnings and shareholder value. Why is the o in Mowi so wack? More importantly, why is this product mojito-flavored? Brown sugar and rum are prominently featured on the ingredient list. It tasted pretty normal on a bagel, but I suspect the unwise mojito branding is why it ended up at the salvage grocer for $3. (Please note what Mowi thinks every kid wants on Halloween.)
I have a soft spot for goopy, sweet diner coleslaw. Abby does not share my fetish, so I will consume this mayo-forward Stop & Shop special all by my lonesome.
This wild rice is cute AF! Look how tiny and artisanal. A single-serve portion, for grain-lovers on the go.
This week I tried making a zesty little spinach salad with fried onions and hearts of palm as a topper. Except, we bought this product a long time ago, maybe more than a year? The lid was thoroughly fused on, and none of the typical opening tricks would work.
We may have eaten a bit of glass that night.